MY flow is here...This sucks

I took a pregancy test on the 13th and it was negative. I was so so angry. I feel better today..

I had absolutely nothing.  just cramping, back hurting, tired and more cramping..

I called my doctor because it was starting to drive me crazy..

It was day 31, 32, 33 and I finally started to spot a little. The doctor told me that if I dont start my period by

day 35, he would check me for pregancy and then if I am not, he would give me meds so that my period

would come down.  Today, my spotting is heavier, brown and now red. so my period is here.. crazy. If it gets
really heavy then I will be sure and I will start counting today as day 1 (day one is the day when you see it

on your pad), and then on day 5 which would be Tues, I would start my clomid cycle again and then the

entire cycle again. I heard that it doesn't work well on women my age. But who knows.. this will be my last try

and next time I will start IVF..  I truly hope that i am pregnant by my birthday... I want to be pregnant this year

and in another two years pregnant again.   I want to know why it took so long for my period to come??? it is

always on time. I had to be the medicine. I heard that it takes between 1 - 3 times for a woman to get

pregnant...Lord, he is probably going to give me... a big increase in my meds... I hope I dont end up with 6

children, but if I do..I will love all of them and take care of them.. some way.  Right now I am trying to change

day jobs... to get a big increase in my salary.. and I am done with my part-time job at the store..

I am applying for another part-job where I can work at home..  I need this because if worse comes to worse

and I am sick and have to be on disability... heavens knows what might happen. I can at least continue

to work at home on the computer instead of standing on my feet in a store.  I got to prepare for everything.


another  $1500.00 - ready to pour down the drain....

total bills  $2745.00 to pay off by the end of the year. - I wonder if this is tax deductible?



I have to stay positive... i have to stay positive.... I have to stay positive...